"Fiddlesticks"?

What's the deal with that? Have you ever wondered "What the heck is a fiddlestick?" when faced with such an exclamation? If so, you've come to the right place. Here, I will attempt to unravel the mysteries behind this elusive word. However, due to the.. challenged level of intelligence of many readers, I have simplified this presentation to easily digested pictures.

Figure 1: Fiddlesticks - To the uneducated layman



Figure 2: Fiddlesticks - The REAL Deal



Artist's rendition of a fiddlestick in its natural habitat.


Yes indeed. That is a fiddlestick. Found while flying through the Himalayas on my jetpack, I spotted it due to its luminous lime green bark. As a matter of fact, its bright spots are what protects it from it's natural predator: the mountain weasel. It's bright and gaudy colors often cause mountain weasels to attempt run themselves off cliffs, but the fiddlestick's Weasel-Begone™ gas sprayed from tiny pores found its bright spots often kill the mountain weasel before a satisfying crunch signifies their hitting the ground. However, after many, many tests, I have deemed fiddlesticks edible. Upon tasting, I found that they taste very, very green, and would accompany kumquat most excellently. More info on this fascinating flora as it comes in.